Woman and Child First

The New Year

 

"They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself."

--Andy Warhol

Sunday, December 31, 2006 .Taken from Theresa Duncan's blog Wit Of The Staircase

 

 

I've noticed other people's desires to really do something this year. You know - leave that crappy job for something that is more suitable to one's inner self; ditch the loser and go solo for a while etc. People I'm seeing want to aim higher.

A great book to support one's wish to do this is Jack Canfield's  How To Get From Where You Are To Where You Want To Be: The Success Principles (There's a link to success principles for adolescents as well).

I've read it and it's great. Full of success stories and commonsense ideas all with a good grounding in positive psychology. It's got all the visualization = attraction biznezz in it but it is very big on ACTION.

In other words, you can write positive affirmations till the cows come home (they are quite necessary) but you must DO whatever is necessary to achieve what you want.

"They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself."

--Andy Warhol

Sunday, December 31, 2006 .Taken from Theresa Duncan's blog Wit Of The Staircase

An Individual Life

There is not one big cosmic meaning for all,
there is only the meaning we each give to our life,
an individual meaning, an individual plot,
like an individual novel, a book for each person. - Anais Nin

It's interesting that in young adulthood we adopt our own - individual - role models. If we are lucky, those luminarie's keep guiding us and reassuring, long after their deaths and long after the initial infatuation. Nin keeps speaking sense to me, 30 years later.

Spirituality And It's Place In Healing

"When I went out, I often had patients talk about – most of the indigenous patients – talk about calling on the spirits of their forefathers to help. Once in the past, a patient I was treating, a young man, hung himself, and what I saw was the family and the extended family talking to the spirit of their forefathers to help them bear this". - Russell d'Souza, psychiatrist.

D'Souza is based in Melbourne and is one of two pioneers in the field of psychology and its relationship to spirituality. He's done lashings of research to show that a person's spiritual life may in fact be an extremely useful resource to draw on when supporting them to heal. And here's his colleague, another psychiatrist, George Halasz:

"That is in the setting that I really understood that there is a soul – much like there is a ventricle in the heart, there’s a liver in the abdominal cavity or there’s a brain in the cranium, somewhere there’s a reality to the soul. And I thought “ah ha, that’s what has been neglected”.

Personally, I'm relieved to be given the go-ahead to explore this with clients. I have done so only in the past where the client has made explicit reference to it. I shall be more confident in bringing up the subject now, having previously been scared of perhaps imposing my own beliefs (and therefore being unprofessional).

The same ethical principle still applies of course, the green light of which I speak allows the therapist to encourage the client's own opening of pathways to spirit, not necessarily their own.

Link to the interview

Eskimo Medicine Man

The Dragon Will Be Slain

"Fairy Tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten."

G. K. Chesterton

Thanks Simon. (We're still big fans)!

Anna Freud Revisted

An interesting 'by the way' occurred when Rob McAlpine was giving his presentation last week at the pilot training program for treatment of anxiety disorders in children and young people.

In stressing the need for a "multi-modal" approach to treating this condition, he referred to the large body of work that was conducted by Anna Freud and her colleagues concerning anxiety in kiddies. Anna is known as the founder of child psychoanalysis.

It seems the recent research has given credence to the psychodynamic model, originated by Anna's papa Sigmund. Much of the kudos and consequent ideas comes from her meticulous note keeping. (Interestingly, Sigmund wasn't big on notes). There are numerous documented successes - kids just stopped being anxious after her interventions.

To Diagnose Or To Not Diagnose. This is the Grunt.

I'm in the middle of a professional development course "Assessment and management of anxiety in children and young people". It's a School-Link training course, a joint initiative between the Departments of Education and Health (New south Wales).

It's being run by two exceptionally good practicioners, based in Sydney. (Rob McAlpine and Anthony Hillin- website link later when I can find it through the pages of course readings).

The advisory group for the curriculum development has been made up of people from the NSW Institute of Psychiatry, Dept Ed, TAFE, Community Mental Health and anyway, lots of professional people representing an array of care providing industires.

Sorry about all that - just felt I needed to provide some guts to where the next couple of posts will be coming from!

A highly informative and instructive course.

There are something to the tune of 16 anxiety disorders, as specified by the DSM IV (Diagnostic and Statisical Manual 4th ed.) Social phobia, panic disorder, specific phobia, post traumatic stress disorder, obsessives compulsive disorder, to name a few. Each have fairly specific treatment implications.

It became apparent that some people in the (very diverse) group felt it is not the prerogative of some professionals to offer diagnoses...That this role was to be left to "those of us who are able to make such diagnoses".

The concern is justified (We don't want incompetent people running around giving out labels to children and parents. Labels which have serious, long term implications). The arrogance with which it was delivered I think,is not.

I always roll my eyes when in a room of psychologists and professional intelligent people, we have this sort of carry-on.

There were two implications here:

1) that only clinical psychologists and the like were suitably qualified to diagnose and

2) that those "other" people working in this field are not able to exercize sound professional judgement in the process of diagnosis (That is, formulation and delivery...including the decision to deliver it or not).

What do you think?

My personal opinion (and way of working) is this: I don't give out labels/diagnoses without extreme caution and consultation with at least one other professional whose expertise is established. For the most part, I don't give out a diagnosis. I offer explanations and treatment strategies and as much help as I can. A diagnosis from me is mostly seen as a way of communication to another psychologist or professional who is working with the same client.

Within the school system, a diagnosis, not from me, but a paediatrician or psychiatrist is essential before needed funds can get to the school so the child can have support (and hopefully understanding too).

Other times, parents are asking you directly for a label. Giving them one lets them know that their child's condition is recognized, acknowledged and has a name. It reduces feelings of isolation and empowers them to be able to manage the thing. It's a positive experience. The sense of relief is palpable.

I'd love some feedback on this. It's a juicy one! What are your experiences with labelling and diagnosis?

A Greater Good

Although I haven’t seen good research to substantiate this theory that mothers’ happiness directly influences the happiness of their children, a fairly extensive body of research has established a substantial link between mothers who feel depressed and “negative outcomes” in their children, like acting out and other behavior problems. As you might imagine, when we mothers feel depressed it is not good for our children’s happiness. -Christine Carter, Ph.D.,

Yet another reason to look after yourself. I repeat, to nourish and nuture oneself as a woman, a mother is NOT a luxury, it's an essential.

The above snippet comes from a blog that looks closely at the "Science of Raising Happy Children".

Can't remember how I stumbled on it, but I'm really enjoying reading from it. Over to the sidebar for you, Half Full Blogversations!

Painting by Kim Richardson

What haunts...Our Secrets

Inspired by my own family secrets, what haunts... is an interactive art installation that explores secrets and their universality. Viewers respond and participate by reading and adding, in anonymity, their own - often-intimate - secrets to the installation. The varied secrets evoke sadness, horror, shock, humor, and reassurance. They "are riveting to read, telling stories of abortion, adoption, and affairs mixed with more universal confessions, like, 'my heart is broken and I am terrified.'"  - Cathy McLaurin

The artist reports people are strongly drawn to this art piece. Probably because all of us keep secrets.

I was taught to teach children not to keep certain secrets (like that they are being abused).

Secrets can be a torment and a burden.

Many of us keep secrets for decades. Many die with our secrets still buried deep in our psyches and in our hearts...aching for release.

But then...secrets are so tantillizing aussi.

So it's intriguing isn't it, that while we are compelled to keep secrets, this piece of art shows we are just as driven to expose them. The curtained "room" where the participants pen their secrets anonymously becomes a confessional.

Aren't we interesting, complex creatures?

Girls Into Women

"Are we are losing the war for girls' self-esteem? We are fighting the media, popular culture, teenage stresses and peer pressure for the minds, values and habits of our girls. Girls' self-esteem plummets around age nine:

• Girls face depression twice as often as boys by age 15.
• 20–40% of girls aged ten have started dieting.
• Girls as young as 10 confront "teen" issues such as sex.
• Eating disorders among the most common mental health problems in girls.
• Low self-esteem leads to dangerous sexual behavior.

The good news is that despite these pressures, parents have more influence on their kids than they think." - article from NYU Child Study Centre.

I always love to read that last sentence. Let's be positive and firm with our girls. Let's show them how it is to live as a strong and self-determined person. They need that from their parents now more than ever. This article has some good reminders about creating confidence within our daughters.

The strongest messages come from us, their parents. This is good to remember!

Post Natal Depression

Tell me how hard it is for a previously high functioning woman to admit she has postnatal depression.

Here's the answer: Very Very Hard.

It's not eased either by a societal obsession with the image of High Functioning Motherhood. (HFM aka Huge Freaking Myth).

Many of us have it and "soldier" on regardless, pretending that the body we now have isn't that much different, that a continuous lack of sleep is something we just have to deal with (used as a form of torture anywhere else) and that childbirth itself isn't, for some of us anyway, traumatic!

If you have PND it's so very understandable. Here are some tips:

-Don't let it eat you up, because it truly would love to do that.

-Get out and about, even and especially when you don't feel like it.

-Tell someone.

-Get  your exercize happening, alone preferable, with baby in pram otherwise.

- Accept that social and emotional supports are essential at any time, but right now they are life-changing.

- Stop overworking.

- Read, watch, listen to any of your old favourite books,films or music.

-When baby sleeps, so does mummy. Housework waits. That's the rule.

Not a bad little note.